The pain in my back is fire.
The pain in my heart is ice.
Each ripples and receds
At the edges of its borders,
Daunting and cruel
In its refusal to fade away.

I befriended a butterfly,
Young and strong,
Who carries things without a care
And keeps his wings buzzing bright.

Yet a cat cannot pin down this butterfly
And keep it unharmed and new,
To leave it as itself
I must watch in confusion from my stable condition.

Superboy and the Invisible Girl

I'm invisible.
I'm forgettable.
I won't pretend I don't care,
But it also doesn't bother me,
In the way aches don't matter
Because you're used to them.

So look at him,
Dressed to the nines every day,
With a winning smile
And loping gait.
His intelligence is proven
By the school he attends.

I will pass by unseen,
In my jeans and t-shirt.
I'm used to it,
I know that to so many,
I'm not there.

Those that see me,
Some care for me so much
I am always there and they always hear me.
A few see me
Because they're invisible too.

It's no surprise to this invisible girl
That superboy doesn't seem
To look twice at her.

Don't love me,
For I am so wrong.
I am chaos
And ugly.
How I could think
That you could notice me,
Befriend me,
Is beyond comprehension.

My fingernails
Are cracked and bloody
From ripping at this mask
I've worn for so long
And sewed in place
That I might participate
In man's fatal duality.
Yet has this mask
Made a coward of me?

There is a disorder in my loves,
And love does conquer all after all,
All must bow to love.
But I cannot bow enough,
Cannot tear enough
Cannot rip out enough of this thrice-damned pride
To crawl away
And cry for help to those that can aid me.
I cannot weep;
I will not let myself
So I condemn myself to agony,
Knowing that I must turn,
Must change,
But these changes are difficult for a reason.
They cannot be made alone.

It's October now.
I can see it by the leaves.
The reds and yellows
That I want to snatch up,
Carry off,
And seal away to keep this time
In place forever.
How swiftly I would lose
The terms Faust set down
And Goethe wrote,
I can scarcely believe.