The Stage Manager's "Wouldn't It Be Loverly"

all I want is a booth somewhere
far away from this fake wig hair -
no cell phones go off there
oh wouldn't it be loverly.

lots of chocolate for me to eat.
actors in their places? Sweet!
and no dumb ones to beat
oh wouldn't it be loverly.

oh how loverly sitting absa-bloomin'-lootly still
actors won't stick out of the wing-
and cues go when I will -

someones there on headset with me -
warm and sassy as they can be -
who take good care of me
oh isn't it so loverly.

Leaves are turning red and gold,
a wide array of colors -
and some match the broken mug
that is all I have left
to remind me of a friendship I broke.

I wish you could have been
as clear sighted as Odysseus
and as willing to turn as Raskolnikov.
But you proved as blind
as a poor student with an axe
and as stubborn
as an ancient hero.

I do not wish you
as I would be you be -
for then we would end
each other's fools.
As we already have.

Do me one last favor,
nearly two years
since we finally parted?
Cease haunting me.

A balancing act
is only as good
as the supporting leg.

I wrote before
about a duality,
a split-
a division of affection
that I feel once more.

But then I was more innocent,
and saw a soul
divided in twain-

Now I see double
for there are two to see.

It is strange,
wanting the kiss of one
untrusted

and hungering for
the simple company
of one who will forget
you all too soon.

Even stranger
Is the longing
That none of this
Would exist,
That I can pull myself
free of this mire
And sail on,
Relaxed and happy.

In all probability,
no one will ever
return my affections, so...

But at least I have
that picture of Hiddleston
I taped to the fridge.

She's back!
Fiery hair and soul
burning bright
where she belongs.
She is life,
a bubbling smile
and laugh that carries
and warmth and-

It can take awhile,
but the heat of the sun
can warm earth,
who then jealously clings
to light it was given.

I can't do all i want to-
All I need to-
I'm fading so quickly-
A star collapsing
Before it began to shine-