I'm sick and this sucks

Sighing back to work,
feeling a little like a let down,
but it's not my fault-
my responsibility
but not my fault.

My lungs are fighting for air
because of some dumb illness
lingering around me
like an over-stayed guest.
Remind me to buy orange juice.

I'll survive. I hope.
I'm at least taking better care
of myself than my littler friend
who has it worse.
Modern medicine is amazing.

Easter Vigil

It's dark in the basilica.
The lights are all off
(except for the small ones
by the emergency exit
because this is both a place of prayer
and a museum)

when suddenly a fire roars to life-
maybe I'm overdramatizing that
but candles slowly make their way
cutting through the darkness

until this old and gorgeous church
is lit by the candles of the faithful

my friend succumbs to sickness during the service,
and I keep her down in the pew,
rubbing circles into her back to ease her lungs
while my lips whisper old french prayers

The Light of the World returns,
no matter what He rises.
The basilica is bright and beautiful
to reflect His Glory

even in a pew
keeping an ill friend
this side of conscious,
worship of the Divine is still possible

Joyeux Paques!

I watched a woman die
as I leaned out a 9th story window.

It was a busy affair-
and the news won't tell me much more than
"she's in critical condition"-
but the paramedics did CPR.

I watched them,
the men and women from the ambulance,
one at her side
the other at her head,
as they forced her heart to beat
and her lungs to take in air.

About 30% of CPR patients live.
This time they also had to use the AED.

I watched for several minutes,
useful only to pray,
as they placed the woman onto a backboard
and carried her into the ambulance,
doing CPR the entire time,
ceaseless,
unending,
changing the medics as necessary.

I watched them drive away,
the streets still blocked off,
and still,
I could only pray
for the woman I watched die.

Drove and drove,
and here I am,
sitting in a different country
tired but happy
to see new spaces
and breath in new air,
with friends at my side.

I spent my afternoon
cleaning and then breathing-
relaxing?
reclining?

being?

I spent it happy,
whatever verb it is I'm missing.

I spent it
breathing in the company
of people I like,
of a person I love,
and what could have been a better start
to an extra-long vacation?

Limping towards break,
basically,
counting down days,
ready to give up
but not giving in,
for soon it will be
freedom

There is a man
filling my life
with color and joy,
with flowers-
I never knew
I could smile so wide
so often
yet here he is,
proving me wrong
as a grin stretches
with the effort to express
just how much
I want to explode with joy.